well, i'm back in davenport for a month.
i was sooo excited to come home, and it is nice to be home in my own room with my family, but i really would rather just be in chicago. i feel like i was finally getting to a point where i just didn't care anymore. i've grown up and changed so much as a person, but i feel like being back here has made me go back to who i was.
honestly, for the past few months, i've been the happiest i ever have been. not just because i've met people, but for once i feel like i have more control of who i am and how people perceive me. here, everyone knows who i am, who my friends are, and what i do. but starting fresh and defining myself differently has been life changing. lately, the little things have been getting to me and just making me upset. i'm really just not as happy. i'm remembering more and more why i wanted to leave here so much. i love my friends here, but it's not enough anymore.
sorry doug! not as positive as usual. haha.
i know everything will work out. i know God is in control. i know that He has placed me where i am supposed to be. maybe this is all happening for a reason.
"i believe everything happens for a reason. people change so that you can learn to let go. things go wrong so you that you can appreciate them when they're right. you believe lies so that you will eventually learn to trust no one but yourself, and sometimes, things fall apart, so better things can fall together."
-marylin monroe